Tell your friends and foe alike of this wonderful news, for a tale of this magnitude should be spared from no one. Now, I had a terrible condition that meant I would bruise, and my easily disgraced exterior would restrict my fun. One fateful day I met a chap named Ricardo aboard a cruise, and he encouraged me to relax, to sit around in the sun.
Boy, did I sure take him up on that advice! These days I collect unemployment checks for exercise and the most important decision of the day is usually what flavor potato crisps I will be consuming for lunch. For more info, give one of my buddies in Shelbyville a buzz (he hangs out at the library), or send me a line, further down the line. This is an example of something you can cook up with all of this free time if you have the ideological inclination to do so:
POSTMODERN PHILOSOPHY AS APPLIED TO CONGRESSIONAL ETHICS
Maxine Waters (D-CA) is accused of wrongly intervening on behalf of a minority-owned bank during the 2008 bank crisis, on which her husband serves as a member of the board. Maxine Waters has always been a supporter of minority-owned banks, however, and she is a liberal firebrand. Revelations that her highly capable grandson serves as her chief of staff are not pertinent.
Roland Burris (D-IL) is accused of wrongly attempting to solicit benefits as part of a deal between himself and ex-Gov. Rod Blagojevich in the financial competition to fill Barack Obama's Senate seat as part of the Governor's “pay-to-play” tactics. Roland Burris, who named his son Roland II and his daughter Rolanda (look it up), claims only to have expressed interest in the seat following the exposion of the Governor's corruption, and would not have been stupid enough to agree to contribute money to the Governor in return for a Senate seat. Right?
Charlie Rangel (D-NY) is accused of wrongly accepting gifts from lobbyists, driving an unregistered vehicle without a House parking permit for several years, using government money for recreational trips, and a whole bunch of other stupid bullshit (would you turn down a free vacation? Of course not. It's rude).
